Belinda, Taylor and Zac stood uncertainly outside Jonathan Conter’s hotel room. After a while, Zac reached up and tentatively knocked on the hard, unforgiving wood of the door.
No one answered. Just as they were about to give up and go away, the doorknob turned and the door swung open.
Belinda and Zac gasped. Standing in front of them was the most handsome man they had ever seen, apart from Taylor.
Jonathan Conter, distant relation of the royal family of Berlitzia, had shining coal-black hair down to his shoulders, and a set of brilliant blue eyes, almost as bright as Taylor’s.
“Yo,” Jonathan said calmly, as if he already knew them. Taylor’s eyes narrowed.
“Come in,” said Jonathan. They walked inside. Jonathan cleared a pile of junk off the lumpy bed in the corner. “You can sit here if you want,” he offered.
“No thanks, we’ll stand,” said Belinda. The bed was missing one leg and so leaned drastically. It looked very uncomfortable.
“Sooo...” Started Zac, nervously.
“Yeah?” Prompted Jonathan. He reclined on the bed and pulled out a packet of cigarettes. He offered the packet to the three teenagers, who declined politely.
“Well, see, the thing is, y’know Thayet?” Bumbled Zac.
“Yeah, cool chick,” replied Jonathan from under a cloud of smoke.
“See, d’ya wanna marry her? Please?” Zac begged.
“Yeah, alright. She’s still in Alaska, isn’t she? Queer place, Alaska.”
Zac breathed a sigh of relief. "Phew. That's settled then. We can go, now.Ó
“Hey, wait a second,” Belinda put in. “Aren’t you meant to be dating a girl called Ilana?”
“Nope,” said Jonathan calmly. “Dumped the slut a couple of weeks ago.”
“Oh. Good. Well, thanks a lot. See ya later.” Belinda, Taylor and Zac walked out of the Dead Flea Motel and back towards the National Gallery.

“I thought he was a bit sleazy, actually,” said Taylor as they walked.
“Shut up Tay. You’re just jealous ‘cause he’s almost as good looking as you," replied Belinda.
“Yeah,” agreed Zac. “But Jonathan doesn’t have that indescribable ‘something’ you have, though. You’re just so darn sexy.”
“Whatever,” mumbled Tay. They kept walking.

When Belinda, Taylor and Zac arrived back at the gallery, they found Walker, Diana, Isaac, Jessica, Avery, and Mackenzie standing in a line outside the building. They all had extremely angry looks on their faces. Even Zoe, who couldn’t stand or even sit up, had a grimace on her normally placid chubby features, although in her case, it could have been wind.
Belinda, Taylor and Zac tried to rearrange their faces into more innocent-looking lines, and sidled up to their family, feelings of guilt and trepidation making their hearts beat at a speed previously unknown.
As soon as Walker saw the cringing three he exploded.
“Where the f-, I mean, where the dickens have you been?!!!”
Zac looked at Taylor, Taylor looked at Belinda, and Belinda looked at her feet.
Taylor tried a charming smile. "Uhmm... We went to the bathroom?"
“Oh.” Walker was satisfied. Until he realised... “Hang on a second, you went to the bathroom for three hours? I think not.”
“Shit.” They had been discovered.
“Just a minute, Dad,” Taylor excused them. He dragged Zac and Belinda a little way off.
“Whadda we do now?” He asked them in a panic. The three put their heads together in a huddle and thought...

“We need a plan,” said Zac. “It has to be a really good one to get us out of this mess.”
“We should do something confusing," put in Belinda.
“Yeah,” agreed Taylor. “Confuse them, that’s the idea.”
“We could threaten to commit suicide if they ask us where we’ve been...”
“Nah. They might take us seriously, and we’d still get punished.” “We could pretend we were kidnapped, and we escaped.”
“Actually, that’s quite a good idea.”
“Of course it’s a good idea, I thought of it.”
“Put your ego away, Taylor.”
“Whatever, Zac. It’s not as if you have a better idea.”
“All right, guys. Let’s quit arguing, okay? We’ll go with the kidnapping plan."
“Nah. Won’t work anyway. Mom and Dad’d never let us go out of the house again.”
“OK, then, let’s see... Oh! I know! We went upstairs to see the Renoir paintings, and Zac fell down the stairs and broke his leg, so we carried him downstairs, and went to find someone with a medical degree who could help. We couldn’t find anyone, so we dragged Zac all over the city trying to find someone who would help, but all the doctors have gone on strike until someone owns up to leaving this really smelly toaster in a bus which goes from the dentist to the biggest department store in Melbourne. Anyway, all this took about three hours. It’ll help if we look like we’re about to cry, and Zac, you might want to limp or something.”
“Great idea, Bel! Let’s go, then!”

Belinda, Taylor and Zac went back over to the rest of the Hansons, Zac limping.
“So, what happened, then,” asked Jessica, hands on hips. “And this’d better be good.”
“Well,” Taylor began. “We went upstairs to see the Renoir paintings, and Zac fell down the stairs and broke his leg, so Bel and I carried him downstairs, and went to find someone with a medical degree who could help. We couldn't find anyone, so we dragged Zac all over the city trying to find someone who could help us, but all the doctors have gone on strike until someone owns up to leaving this really smelly toaster in a bus which goes from the dentist to the biggest department store in Melbourne. And it took THREE HOURS!” Taylor’s voice cracked with emotion. A tear ran down his cheek and hung quivering on his chin.
Walker, Diana, Isaac, Jessica, Avery, Mackenzie and Zoe were overcome with remorse at suspecting this obviously innocent trio of doing anything even remotely naughty.
Diana gave her second eldest baby a hug. “Don’t cry, Taylor. We’re really sorry we suspected you, even for a minute.”
Walker joined in the apologies. “Yes. Forgive us. Here’s fifty dollars each.”
“Gee, thanks, Walker,” said Belinda.
“Yeah, thanks Dad,” said Taylor.
Zac gave a large, fake, groan. They all turned towards him.
“We’d better get you to hospital, honey,” said Diana. Mackenzie picked up Zac and they all walked off in the direction of the nearest hospital, the toddler struggling under the weight of his older brother. No one thought to help him carry Zac, and something in Mackenzie's back went "click". He struggled on...

[ 18 ]